By: Daniel B., Transformations Alumnus
Life for me lately could be described as a 1,000-piece puzzle…a work in progress. As a child I would always see assembling such a puzzle as an insurmountable task. That is how I also viewed putting my life back together after coming back into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous now almost 11 years ago on March 7th 2012.
First, I sorted the pieces into piles…slowly, carefully…family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, and acquaintances. I began by shoring in the boarder or framework of my life’s puzzle with these very special people, knowing that I couldn’t rebuild the rest without them. There were piles of very dark pieces and when they were all together, they served as reminders of the pain and hurts that there has been in my life. This part of the puzzle did not appeal to me but soon I realized that without those in place, I would not have been able to fill in the brightly colored portions, picture pieces of the good times spent with loved ones…weddings, children, vacations and celebrations of life. I realized just how much their luster illuminated the dark spot, shedding light upon them, making them appear to have a radiance all their own. They were so important to the big picture, and they had to be there.
As I worked my way inward on my puzzle, I found that there were pieces missing. When I looked at the illustration on the box, I noticed that these pieces were the faces of loved ones who had passed on before me. The thought of completing the puzzle with pieces missing did not appeal to me. I did not want the finished product to have gaps or holes. Suddenly, it dawned on me that the memories of those people would always be a part of me. That sense of emptiness would be filled with the beautiful memories and the parts of them that would always be in me and so I continued. Gradually I got to the center of my puzzle. Imagine my surprise when I noticed that it was already filled with a single heart shaped piece bearing only one word…God! God had always been at the core of my life and that is what made it possible for me to reconstruct it now.
I thought some more, and I realized, too, that at any point something might happen to cause the pieces to shift or move or even worse, fall completely apart. If that happens, the piece that is God will not get lost since it is nowhere near the edge but rather firmly grounded in the center…His Heart in mine. I chose not to mount or glue the finished project to a board as that would deny my trust that God would always be there for me.
Someday, the piece of the puzzle that is me will also be gone. That hole will also be filled with the faith, love, and memories that I leave behind for my family and friends. I hope that I have taught them to keep God at the center of their lives and to build a life filled with the love of family and friends and to never take one single piece of their puzzle of life for granted.
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