Moving here to South Florida in 1994, my plan was to go where I knew no one, and no one knew me, in hope this adult alone backlit 268833would help me stop using. Did this work? Yes for about four months. But being the addict that I’m, I know where to find what I’m really looking for. I was going downtown one day in West Palm Beach and made a wrong turn and that’s when I found a place where I could get a small fix. Little did I know this small fix would turn into years of destruction. I started using again. I always felt I had control of my addiction and believed I was functioning addict. I could see that this was a habit but deep down inside, I didn’t think I needed help. I had a good job, my daughter went to nice schools, I had cars, money, a nice house, but I didn’t have myself.

people sign traveling blurI wanted to stop but, then again I didn’t know how. I became involved with a drug cartel in 1995. I stared trafficking drugs from other countries back to the United States. I put myself and family in dangerous situations and this went on for several years. My last trip to Jamaica is when things turned around for me. I was coming back and when I was going through customs, I was asked a lot more questions than normal during my travels. At this time I knew I was caught. I was searched and taken into custody at the Federal Detention Center in Miami, waiting for my bond hearing. My bond was set so high I thought this was the end of my life.

The next morning I was able to get out on bond and was placed on pretrial while awaiting my trial. I was hit with courtroom 898931 640 1three charges. While on pretrial I was using and could not pass a drug test. I had to go back in front of the judge to find out if violated my pretrial release. While in front of the judge, I was told I violated my pretrial release and would be sent to prison. I was afraid to go to prison so I told the judge that I had a problem and I was court ordered to go to treatment. I only went to treatment to escape going to prison. I did not take it seriously and I had reservations after getting out about going back to my “normal” life.

After a month in treatment I was kicked out and during the time being out, a warrant was put out for my arrest for violation again. I went back in front of the judge, and asked if I could return to treatment and I was granted to return back. The second go-round I decided to work on myself. After completing five months of treatment I was discharged and I took all the suggestions that were given to me and applied them to my life. I found a home group, I got a sponsor, I worked the steps, and six months later I had to go in front of the judge again to be sentenced. I was looking at seven to 10 years in federal prison, but with the help of NA and treatment and the suggestions I finally took, I was sentenced to thirty months. I completed 18 months, and 12 of the months I was in a drug program. I wanted to make sure I could get all I could before going back into society.

meditation 1820485 640Once I was released I still had a lot ahead of me. I had to complete six months of half way, and 10 ½ years of probation. I lost my job, car, house, and had no money; the Feds took it all. I didn’t just lose material things, I had to send my daughter to Maryland and I didn’t see her for three years. Just imagine, taking a four year old to school one morning and not seeing her until three years later. It hurt. I had to persevere knowing that it was going to get better. After getting out of half way I was able to reunite with my daughter and make a better life for not only her, but for myself. My recovery came first. I had to live places I didn’t want to live, and work at places that would allow me to be employed because I was a convicted felon. Today I work in a field that I never dreamed of working in and I love what I do. I’m so grateful today. I lost my mother when I was 11 years clean, but I’m so happy that she was able to see me get my life back on track. Today I’m grateful to say I have 19 years clean and I have a beautiful 5-month-old granddaughter. I’m currently in school to pursue my career in the addiction field. Today I will persevere.